The Last Few Days

Hello all.
If you haven't noticed by now, my home town and I have a very love hate relationship. Now that my time here is coming to a close, I'm wishing for a little bit more time. At the same time I know that most of my internal struggles will be coming to an end once I leave here. Last night I went to a party that I was very unwelcome at, and that's one thing I don't miss about this town, as you can read in my pervious post. It all goes back to everyone getting into everyone's business. I hate that with a passion. Personally me not being welcome at this party was a little outrageous because the thing that caused my heart to be sad over Christmas shouldn't cause me to not be welcome with friends. But that's just my opinion.

Last night was awkward at first. The only person that I wanted to speak to wouldn't even look at me. That's probably one of the worst feelings I've ever encountered, someone not being able to look at you. His reasons are some that I don't understand, but I understand myself, and I understand how horrible it's feeling to not be able to just say 'lets be friends and go back to the way it was before'. With time I want this to fix itself, I know that I'm going back to Montreal leaving things in a mess, but I have to trust that things will work themselves out, right? I'm wondering if that whole saying is just to keep you sane, or if it's really true.

So with only two days left here, I'm torn. I want to stay, but I want to leave. This sucks. This song is what I'm trying to use to heal myself. I guess I have a lot of experience trying to heal myself.
Song of the Post:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4URCe40Y0sI

I guess if I'm going to give a summary of my time at home it has to go a little like this: Home will always be home. Things cannot be changed sometimes and it tears me apart. I'm going to miss my friends more than ever, because I'm not back here again until May. I hate saying goodbye. I've said so many goodbye's recently that its something I keep avoiding. I'm also excited to start my new classes in about a week, and I hope this semester goes by as quickly as the first one did.

Before I go I'm going to leave you with this, a photo of how things get 'fixed' in my town. I hope you understand my frustrations.

Good night, good morning, good afternoon, but talk to you soon.
Love, Kate

Merry Christmas 2013

Hello my few readers, and Merry Christmas. I'm sorry I'm a day late posting, but Christmas day doesn't leave a hell of a lot of time to blog. I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas, with al the presents, food, and family time we could all hope for. If you're in Canada, more specifically, Ontario, Toronto region, I hope you were one of the lucky ones with electricity. I spent my Christmas in Brampton, Ontario where we were one of the few to have power, very very thankfully. If you don't celebrate Christmas, I hope you enjoyed the holiday that you do celebrate.

So was your holiday happy and jolly, or was it filled with that family holiday drama. Personally I was internally dealing with drama, but my family was good. My family some how is that family that doesn't fight and piss each other off. I know it sounds unbelievable but its actually true I'm ridiculously lucky. I was dealing with things with my father, and some rejection from something that shouldn't have made me sad. I think when you combine two sad things at the holidays it makes it almost melt down worthy. My heart was sad during Christmas 2013, my anxiety was high, but I'm truly thankful that other than some internal conflicts that I had a good Christmas.

One thing about this winter break thing I hate is spending this expanded period of time in my home town. Some things never change, one of them is this town. I could paint a picture but I'm sure if you've ever lived in a small town you could get the gist. But for the sake of those who don't know what I'm talking about here's the 3 things that I can't stand about my small town (& small towns alike)
1. Everyone knows everything about everyone. Remember that one time you got to drunk and embarrassed yourself? You might not but everyone you know will tell you about it for years to come.
2. The smallest things cause everyone to freak the fuck out. You kissed an ex of someone you were never friends with? You're a fucking home wrecker, get out.
3. Literally nothing changes. That person that got that job in wal-mart in high school and goes to community college? Still works at wal-mart.

I'm sorry for the rant on the small town. No sorry I'm not I'm just really sick of this place and miss the anonymity of the big city. Montreal, Monday I'm back and I've missed you too much. Truly guys I love my friends here, but some times your friends aren't enough to keep your mind away from the drama that is always present in a small town.

Song of the Post:
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dlFEJ-Ctpjc
I know I usually offer an explaination, but this song just makes me happy.

Good night, good morning, good afternoon, but talk to you soon.
Love, Kate

Passing Classes, Yes!

Hello lovely's of the inter-webs.

Let's all do the Saturday before Christmas dance. Christmas feels like it came extremely fast this year, I can't believe its on Wednesday. But I got an early present this year, some of my grade FINALLY got posted, and look at me ma! I'm a passing University kid! I've never been one to be proud of marks in school, but apparently paying for it and working my ass off gives me incredible amounts of pride.

Anyway, I've fallen back into my at-home schedule, and I'm actually enjoying it. I've been to busy to actually realize how much I hate this place. I spent last night at a small house party, with some long lost friends, and it was actually a blast. Honestly before I went I heavily considered no showing up, but I dragged my best friend along and we had a lot of fun. Hashtag hangover. I can say for sure I haven't missed the waking up at 5 am feeling like crap after 2 hours of sleep because of alcohol. That's got to be one of the best parts of living in Montreal, drunk food is always just a stumble away, and you feel a 100% better in the morning if you eat a burger before bed. Maybe that's just me?

Since I'm in this feel good state, here's a feel good Song of the Post:
Anything - Hedley
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_Dmilr2T10
If you haven't listened to these guys before, take a listen. Some seriously great Canadian music here.

Before I go to curl up in my onesie, I want to call attention to, two things that have really resonated with me in the past couple days.

First off, I wanted to write a little something about the death of one of my favourite author's, Ned Vizzini.  If you haven't heard what happened, here's a link to an article published yesterday about what happened: http://tinyurl.com/ogwdrw4 . Ned was one of my beloved author's. I can glance to my left side as I sit here and type this and look at his books on my bookshelves. I've always loved to read, and my love of reading has turned into what I've decided to study in University. When I read Ned's It's Kind of a Funny Story, something really stuck with me. Mental health is just as important, if not more important than physical health. Ned wrote the book about his brushes with mental health problem's and his stay in a psych ward. When I found out he had died I was very upset. In all honesty, the death's of authors hit me harder than death's of any other kind of 'celebrity' figure. I hope you rest in peace Ned, this world will miss you very much, and your talent for writing beautiful novels.

My second thing I wanted to discuss was this video I watched about two days ago. I think that modern feminism is something that needs to stop being laughed at and taken more seriously. I'll discuss this video in my next post, if I receive any feed back, but take a peak, you might find something very interesting out.
http://www.upworthy.com/stop-asking-where-young-feminists-are-they-arent-unicorns-they-exist-in-fact-here-s-one-now-re2-6e?c=ufb1

Okay, so I'm going to leave you now after this obnoxiously long post. I hope you have a wonderful couple of days, if you decided to come back, post a comment below, about anything I've touched on today. Seriously guys I want to hear from you!! As always,
Love, Kate

Hey, Hi, How's it going?

So it's been a week. Second posts should feel more natural right? Well first off, I've decided once a week is too little, so now I will be posting on Saturdays and Wednesdays. This past week has been incredibly stressful and busy that I've wanted to post, but like to stick to my words.

Exams are done!!! YAY. The stress that ensued me during the last week was a little ridiculous, considering how easy I found my exam. Needless to say, I'm incredibly happy to be home, relaxing, and to be putting my first semester behind me. From Montreal to Niagara Falls, I'm back in the home land for an entire 2 weeks, which is the longest time I've stayed since moving day back in August. The oddness of falling back into my home routine of working, seeing high school friends, and having a hundred percent too much time on my hands is taking some adjustment, but I'm sure I'll manage.

So with my first semester behind me, I've looked back and realized all the interesting thing I've learned since I've moved to Montreal and experienced university. These are a couple things I've learned :

• "Ladies Night" doesn't mean free, or even fun for that matter
• The left side of the escalator is not for standing
• Halloween, is indeed the funniest, and sloppiest time of the year
• Alcohol always tastes better when it's free
• Breaking Bad night was the most important night of the week
• It's okay to get ridiculously drunk while watching hockey (GO HABS GO)
• Missing a lecture, will never ruin your life

I'm certain there has been more discovered, but this winter-break-not-thinking state has taken over.

So while I'm sitting here in my high school bedroom, I'm racking my brain as to what will bring you, my favourite people of the inter-webs, back to my blog. Then it hit me in the face, music. Music is my favourite thing (aside from an open bar), also it is something our generation connects with. So a new feature of my blog: Song of the post.

So here it is my Song of the Post
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSUOKe1P-SY
Being home has brought me back to my country roots, and I really can't get enough of this song.

So I'm leaving you now. But not to worry, if you're actually enjoying any of this, I'll be back on Saturday. For now, please post in the comments below, what your can't get enough of winter break song is. Thank you once again for visiting, I hope I have sparked an interest.
Love,
Kate

First Awkward Introductions

So here it is, finally getting my own blog. It's something that I've been wanting to do for quite some time, but as the average college student, procrastination is one of my defining traits. But here I am, with a devoted promise with a post once a week, every Wednesday.

I guess I should introduce myself, if there is anyone out there reading this. My name is Kate, I'm 18 years old, and I am in my first year at Concordia University. I'm studying Creative Writing and English Literature, while living in what I believe to be the most amazing city in the world, Montreal. If you are unfamiliar, Montreal is in Quebec, that big part of Canada to the East that prides it's self on French culture, and does feel, at times, like it's very own country.

I'm here for one reason, to put out there my coming of age experience, documenting that transition from teenager to adult. I have always felt as though my generation is given a bad name, and made fun of on a daily basis. I'm not claiming that it is going to be exciting, but I am however, claiming it to be real. I'll try and leave out the boring details of every day life. I just believe that maybe by writing it down, the real to the rest of the world might start to feel real to me. So I do hope that you'll commit to this journey with me. It's probably not going to be easy. It's probably going to be stressful for myself. It's also probably going to have hormone filled posts, even though I will try my hardest to avoid those, seeing as I feel those things should be left back in high school. This is an offer for you, the world of the inter-webs to see my heart. Please be kind, as I'm just learning how to live in the real world.

I'll end this first post by welcoming, thanking, and telling you about some current events. Being December, it is exam month. My first semester as a University student, now behind me, with only one exam standing in my way. It went by incredibly fast. I feel like it should have taken more time, or that I should feel as though my brain is full of knowledge, instead it feels like mush. I understand now how people can claim that in college you know everything about everything, and everything about nothing. I hope you wish me luck for this British Literature exam I have to write on Saturday, personally, I'm nervous. I got away with only having 1, yes 1, exam in my first semester. Some call it lucky, as for me I call it scary. But hey it's only 40% of my grade on the line, what could be bad?

So people of the inter-webs, I hope to see you next Wednesday, if you have taken any interest in this. Also if you have any suggestions for this blog please post in the comments!
Have an outstanding week,
Kate