The Last Few Days

Hello all.
If you haven't noticed by now, my home town and I have a very love hate relationship. Now that my time here is coming to a close, I'm wishing for a little bit more time. At the same time I know that most of my internal struggles will be coming to an end once I leave here. Last night I went to a party that I was very unwelcome at, and that's one thing I don't miss about this town, as you can read in my pervious post. It all goes back to everyone getting into everyone's business. I hate that with a passion. Personally me not being welcome at this party was a little outrageous because the thing that caused my heart to be sad over Christmas shouldn't cause me to not be welcome with friends. But that's just my opinion.

Last night was awkward at first. The only person that I wanted to speak to wouldn't even look at me. That's probably one of the worst feelings I've ever encountered, someone not being able to look at you. His reasons are some that I don't understand, but I understand myself, and I understand how horrible it's feeling to not be able to just say 'lets be friends and go back to the way it was before'. With time I want this to fix itself, I know that I'm going back to Montreal leaving things in a mess, but I have to trust that things will work themselves out, right? I'm wondering if that whole saying is just to keep you sane, or if it's really true.

So with only two days left here, I'm torn. I want to stay, but I want to leave. This sucks. This song is what I'm trying to use to heal myself. I guess I have a lot of experience trying to heal myself.
Song of the Post:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4URCe40Y0sI

I guess if I'm going to give a summary of my time at home it has to go a little like this: Home will always be home. Things cannot be changed sometimes and it tears me apart. I'm going to miss my friends more than ever, because I'm not back here again until May. I hate saying goodbye. I've said so many goodbye's recently that its something I keep avoiding. I'm also excited to start my new classes in about a week, and I hope this semester goes by as quickly as the first one did.

Before I go I'm going to leave you with this, a photo of how things get 'fixed' in my town. I hope you understand my frustrations.

Good night, good morning, good afternoon, but talk to you soon.
Love, Kate